One of the things that amazes me about conversations surrounding romantic relationships is the discussion of men needing respect while women need love.
It probably wouldn’t grate so much if they didn’t make those two concepts exclusive.
Now, you might be thinking it doesn’t matter, but think of this conversely.
They are basically saying, women don’t need respect and men don’t need love. And we all know that’s hogwash.
None of the men I’ve dated or am friends with have told me they are averse to love, and as a woman, I know I want to be loved the same way I want respect. Not to mention that both are not mutually exclusive; when you love someone, you respect them.
So, honestly, a good way to know a guy loves you is that he respects you. But let’s not go out of context. What matters based on this post is that you should want to know if your man respects you, because it is a strong indication of whether he loves you or not.
That said, let’s look at the signs your boyfriend has deep respect for you.
10 Signs Your Boyfriend Has Deep Respect For You
1. He is honest with you
You might be asking what honesty has to do with respect, but it really does, especially when we are talking about deceit.
Personally, I can understand white lies – we all do it sometimes.
But when someone is lying to you to deceive you, it clearly shows they don’t respect you.
When your boyfriend respects you deeply, though, honesty becomes his default setting.
He won’t sugarcoat the truth or hide things to “protect your feelings.”
Instead, he trusts you enough to be real with you, even when it’s uncomfortable.
He will tell you about his past, his thoughts, or his emotions. He will be upfront because he considers you a partner who should know the truth.
When you start second-guessing yourself around someone and they keep giving you mixed signals, they likely don’t care about you enough to respect you.
If he respects and wants to be with you, he will tell you the truth.
Also Read: Signs Your Partner Is Dishonest with You
2. He acknowledges your opinion
A boyfriend who respects you doesn’t dismiss your thoughts or talk over you like you’re invisible.
He values what you bring to the table.
He won’t shut down your ideas, perspectives, and even your “crazy” suggestions.
He might not agree, but he will always hear you out.
You need to know this because respecting you doesn’t mean he will always say yes to you. In fact, that might be a sign your boyfriend disrespects you.
This is because there is a sense in which people can always agree with you to patronise you, like a little child who needs to be pampered because you can’t handle the truth.
Disagreeing with you even shows that he respects you to handle the conversation as an adult.
3. He respects your boundaries
Does someone even respect you if they don’t respect your boundaries?
No. So, respecting boundaries is a big indication that your partner respects you.
A man who respects you knows that your “no” means no and your “not yet” isn’t a challenge; it’s a line he should not cross.
I get that when you are in a relationship, there is a measure of privacy you lose. However, couples shouldn’t completely lose their individuality and are still allowed a measure of privacy.
So, of course, your partner might protest if you demand too much privacy; that might mean you don’t love him or you are not ready to fully commit to him.
But if you are asking for reasonable boundaries – emotional, physical, or even digital boundaries – a man who respects you will honour them without guilt-tripping or sulking.
He will not push or manipulate you to cross them. Rather, he listens and adjusts to them.
4. He puts you first
You can tell when you’re a priority in someone’s life; you won’t have to ask for attention or beg for time.
A boyfriend who respects you makes space for you in his world, and not just when it’s convenient.
He considers your needs, adjusts his plans, and is there when it matters.
Of course, this doesn’t mean he loses himself in the relationship – you shouldn’t want that for him if you care about him.
He won’t leave everything to answer to you every time you call because he has other engagements at work, with his family and friends, and with his passions and interests.
However, you will see that he’s intentional about showing you that you matter.
For instance, when he has to choose between making you feel secure or pleasing the crowd, he chooses you every time.
Also Read: 15 Thoughtful Acts Guys Do Only When They Are In Love
5. He honours you
Honour sometimes sounds vague, but it is mostly in the way someone speaks to and about you.
How does he talk about you when you’re not around? And how does he speak to you? Is it like someone inferior to him or someone who is his partner?
Now, does that mean he will always be happy with you? No. But even when he is angry, he will present his points without insulting you.
A man who respects you doesn’t put you down or use abusive words on you. Rather, he uplifts you and makes sure others do the same.
He also defends you, supports you, and carries your name with pride.
Plus, a man who honours you doesn’t joke at your expense or roll his eyes when others talk about “women problems.”
Instead, he protects your dignity and always speaks about you with admiration and care.
You’ll feel it in the little things – how he introduces you, how he celebrates your wins, and how he treats your presence like a gift, not a favour.
6. He listens to you
There’s a difference between hearing and listening to someone.
One of the signs your boyfriend respects you is that he will pay attention when you talk; he will not just sit there waiting for his turn to speak.
You will know this by the way he remembers the little details and circles back to things you mentioned before.
This is one of my favourite things about my man – that he remembers things I say even randomly. It shows me he listens.
And people only listen when they value what you have to say, which is also respect. He listens because your voice carries weight in his heart and mind.
If he doesn’t, it shows you what you mean to him.
7. He is committed to you
Respect and commitment go hand in hand. A boyfriend who truly respects you doesn’t treat the relationship like you are the one he is using to while away time until the right person comes along.
He makes it clear, through his words and his consistency, that he’s in it for the long haul. You won’t have to deal with flaky behaviour or half-hearted promises.
When a man respects you, he shows up when it matters and sticks around even when things get tough. He won’t only show commitment when it’s convenient, but he will be there in and out of season.
Also Read: What Love Is Not
8. He trusts you
If you ask me, trust is very flattering. It is even stronger than love for me, especially when the love in question is emotional.
When someone trusts me, it means everything to me, and that’s why I know that it comes with respect.
Giving you his phone password is nice, but that’s not the trust I am speaking of here.
I am speaking about trust for your character, your intentions, and your choices, where he doesn’t question your every move or get jealous over harmless things.
When a man respects you, he gives you the space to be yourself without clinging or micromanaging. And because he trusts you, you also feel safe being honest and independent.
9. He disagrees politely
Like I said earlier, when your partner respects you, he doesn’t feel the need to agree with everything you say.
He will disagree when he has to. However, how he disagrees with you says everything about the level of respect he has.
If he can challenge your opinion without mocking you or making you feel small, that’s maturity and deep respect at work.
One of the signs your boyfriend has deep respect for you is that when he is arguing with you, he doesn’t try to win it by putting you down.
Instead, he tries to understand you and be understood.
Even in heated moments, he watches his tone, avoids low blows, and never uses your vulnerabilities against you.
That control over his emotions shows that your feelings matter to him, even when you’re not on the same page.
10. He doesn’t try to change you
You know he respects you when he loves you as you are and doesn’t see you as some project he needs to fix.
A man who respects you will not make you feel like you’re too loud, too quiet, too emotional, or too ambitious.
After all, he saw who you were before getting in a relationship without the you.
If he didn’t like it, a respectable man would not have pursued a relationship with you.
But since he got with you, he will embrace your uniqueness and support your growth without trying to mould you into someone else.
Sure, he might challenge you to be a better person, but he won’t make you feel you are less than for being your authentic self.
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