One word that is thrown around a lot in the dating world is narcissist, and for so many reasons, that’s valid; narcissists should definitely be avoided.
Also Read: Signs You Are Dating a Narcissist
But there is one even deadlier than a narcissist: a psychopath. And it is not because they are serial killers; that is a misconception. Not all psychopaths are serial killers; in fact, the majority are not.
Instead of thinking about someone that looks deadly, consider that they can be that sweet, charming individual who is good with people and smiles at everyone.
So, no exact physical attribute points to how dangerous they are. What makes a psychopath dangerous is that they have no feelings. Psychopaths have no heart or conscience, so they are unable to feel remorse or guilt when they hurt you.
And many times, it takes getting close to them to find them out; they are very slick and manipulative; much like the narcissist, except that the latter does have a heart.
Thankfully, there are certain psychopath relationship behaviours you can watch out for early on in a relationship to save you from all the trouble.
Surely, I am willing to bet everybody would rather they knew the signs to look out for in identifying a psychopath than finding out when they are deep in a relationship with them.
And if you are already deep in the relationship, now you can identify the problem and start executing your exit plan. So, whatever the case, this blog post will help you.
Having said that, here are the warning signs to identify that you are dating a psychopath or you have one around.
10 Signs You Are Dating a Psychopath
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Extremely Charming
One thing about psychopaths is that they are extremely charming, and that is why they seem to escape being seen as dangerous.
Many times, they reel their victims in before they are found out.
They are likely to be the first person to offer help, compliment you – even your weaknesses – and can seem to be everything you want.
Psychopaths almost always start out as perfect. This is why you should watch out when you are with someone who seems too good to be true; they usually are.
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Grandiose Behaviour
Psychopaths are braggarts; they are unnecessarily grandiose.
They have an extreme superiority complex and are likely to brag about everything and anything.
You will constantly find them name-dropping, wanting to throw their success and achievements in your face.
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Compulsive Lying and Gaslighting
It’d be surprising if they weren’t liars now, won’t it? After all, they need to lie to get their victims where they want them.
They could lie to seem bigger than they actually are because, oftentimes, they are braggadocious.
And sometimes, they could be lying to cover up for something.
But whatever the case, psychopaths are hardly honest. They are very good at lying and finding other lies to cover up the first lie. In fact, they seem to enjoy the thrill of being good liars.
They are also great at gaslighting. Being with a psychopath will constantly make you question your reality and sanity because they can twist issues and make you seem like the problem.
Even when you know they are the problem, they are skilled gaslighters and could make you begin to question what you know as true.
If you find your partner constantly trying to come up with different excuses when caught in a lie, giving stories that don’t add up, and never owning up to their lies, you might want to take note.
Even if they are not a psychopath, you shouldn’t be with a liar anyway.
Read More: Signs Your Partner Is Dishonest with You
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Lack of Empathy
I mentioned above that psychopaths don’t have a heart. So, they are unable to feel or understand the emotions of others.
And that is what makes them dangerous because even when they are caught doing something bad, they are likely not to understand why people have an issue with what they did.
Also, they never show empathy when people are going through sad situations. That is a huge red flag to watch out for.
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Controlling and Manipulative
Like narcissists, psychopaths are controlling. They like to dominate their partners and only feel better when their partners are under their control.
It is almost like they thrive on being in charge of your life; they don’t do well in an interdependent relationship where their partner can seem to handle making their own decisions.
They are also big on manipulation. They are charmers, after all, and liars. So, they are skilled in controlling people and getting people on their side.
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Lack of Emotional Depth
They have no emotional depth. They are very much surface people and cannot hold emotionally-deep conversations.
Psychopaths cannot handle bearing their soul to their partners as they have no soul to bear.
So, you’d often find them getting uncomfortable and even erratic when you demand deep conversations from them.
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Lack of Remorse or Guilt
They never feel remorse or guilt. They have no heart and feel no empathy, so they can never understand how hurtful their actions are.
This is why many serial killers are psychopathic. You’d often find that even when you express how hurtful they are, they don’t seem to get it or will make excuses for what they did.
They are never wrong, and they never take responsibility for their actions. Somebody or something else is always to be blamed.
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Love-Bombing and Flattery
Psychopaths – especially at the beginning – always seem like the perfect partner. They don’t do well with taking things slow and letting a relationship develop naturally.
No, they always rush things and take things too fast. If you are not careful, you can be in a committed relationship with a psychopath in days.
They are perfect love-bombers, and they have the sweetest tongue.
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Insatiable Thirst for Attention
Everybody loves attention from their partner or the person they love. However, for psychopaths, their thirst for attention is insatiable.
Psychopaths don’t enjoy attention taken from them. They could go as far as provoking you when they notice attention being withdrawn.
They could start an argument, put you down or make you jealous to ensure attention is not withdrawn from them.
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Lives for Isolation
Psychopaths cannot form emotional bonds, so they most often don’t have friends.
People who try to be their friends end up leaving them because they are unable to cope with their psychopathic traits.
On the other hand, they are likely to isolate you from your friends and family. Remember that they love control and can only do that when they isolate you.
They will constantly create scenarios to manipulate you into thinking everybody is against you and that they are the only ones on your side.
Little by little, if care is not taken, you’d find yourself having issues with everybody but them.
What to Do When You Find Out You Are Dating a Psychopath
Break Up and Reestablish Boundaries
In case you are wondering how psychopaths act in love, psychopaths are not capable of love in the truest sense of the word. Except, of course, you don’t mind the only kind of love they are capable of offering.
So, don’t deceive yourself by thinking you’d be capable of changing them or that they would change for you; they wouldn’t.
If you find yourself dating a psychopath, your best bet is to break up. And when you do, make sure not to give them room to contact you. Block them everywhere and block every means of reaching you.
Psychopaths can be erratic when rejected. They don’t like rejection, so you would need to be firm if they find other means of reaching you.
And if they persist to the point of stalking you, get a restraining order from the police.
Reestablish Broken Relationships
Dealing with a psychopathic ex would be easier with friends and family supporting you.
So, if you have messed up relationships because of the relationship, it is time to reestablish those relationships.
Reach out to them again, seek their forgiveness and accept their help.
Seek Therapy
Being in a relationship with a psychopath is very traumatic. Most likely, your self-esteem has been bashed, and your sense of reality twisted.
So, it is necessary to speak to a therapist or mental health professional to help you gain perspective, forgive yourself of any lingering guilt of getting involved with a psychopath and work towards restoration.
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