Most people would not choose to be in a long distance relationship if they had a choice because of how potentially strenuous it can be. 

However, sometimes, things happen, and you find yourself in love with someone who lives in a different region.

Or your lover might be transferred to another region, and it’s a good career opportunity that it’d be unwise to say no.

In such situations, different thoughts are likely to pass through your mind. One of such is likely, “what is the best way to make a long-distance relationship work?”

The first secret to a long-lasting, long distance relationship that you need to remember is that it can work.

The moment you believe it is impossible, your relationship is heading for the rocks. The Bible says, “as a man thinks in his heart, so is he.”

So, if you’re already sure your relationship will not make it, it won’t. And the reason is that you won’t do what’s necessary to make your relationship work because you are sure it is already doomed. 

I have good news for you if you can relate to this, long distance relationships work. Many have worked, and yours can, too, as long as both parties are ready to make it work. 

In fact, in some cases, it might even be the best thing for you. 

Also Read: Benefits of Long-Distance Relationships 

So, let’s get to it.

Tips to Make a Long Distance Relationship Work 

  1. Communicate effectively

A relationship can only succeed with communication. However, in a long distance relationship, it is even more critical. 

Remember that you cannot spend time physically together as you would like, but you need to make up for it by communicating effectively. 

Communication is how you stay connected in a long distance relationship. Without it, you might as well not bother. 

However, note that I said “communicate effectively” and not “constantly”. Depending on your schedules, you may not be able to communicate as constantly as you want, but you must make time to speak daily and talk about the things that matter.

Effective communication includes having serious conversations to know each other deeply and share goals and dreams. 

Also Read: Deep Questions to Ask Your Spouse to Know Them Better

It also involves sharing banter and jokes. 

Besides these, it includes consistency. 

You need to create time that works for both of you every day where you can speak at length. However, you should also check in at intervals; send good mornings, good nights, and funny videos, and keep each other updated on what’s happening in life. 

Don’t let your partner ever learn anything about you from someone else or social media. 

Communicating effectively also includes resolving conflict. It is not advisable to settle issues via chat; do it via voice or video call where the tone cannot be misinterpreted. 

Also Read: How to Communicate Effectively in a Relationship

  1. Avoid being clingy

On the other hand, it is possible to want to be clingy to make up for not seeing each other physically. That is another extreme you should avoid. 

While you should make sure to speak and check in daily, you must also give each other healthy space away from each other. 

Don’t expect your partner who works a 9 to 5 job to be available during the day; that’d be unrealistic. 

As much as it may be difficult for you, don’t put undue pressure on your partner to entertain you every second. If you are not as engaged as they are, this is an excellent time to find something productive to stay engaged.

  1. Use the time apart wisely

Instead of seeing it as a disadvantage, see the time apart as an advantage. Don’t waste the opportunity being sad and angry because you are apart from your lover.

Take the time to work on yourself; take that course or start that business you’ve been meaning to. Read books and learn who you are and how to be a better partner.

Use the time wisely so you can get a better version of yourself when you’re back together.

  1. Trust each other

Don’t look too far if you’ve ever wondered about what kills relationships. It is distrust. 

No relationship can survive without trust. And like communication, this is even more real in a long distance relationship. 

If you know you’re not with someone you can trust, you might as well not continue the relationship. If not, you’ll put yourself in unnecessary turmoil. 

Make sure you’re with someone you trust and trust them. Don’t doubt everything they say; you’ll push them away and drive yourself crazy.

tips to make a long distance relationship work

  1. Set and keep boundaries

Set boundaries about what’s acceptable and not in your relationship – within reason. While you don’t have to be codependent, where you cannot live without each other, let your partner know if you will be in a situation that may make them feel threatened.  

And don’t put yourself constantly in situations that your partner will find uncomfortable. 

  1. Leverage technology to do things together

We no longer live in a time where you have to write letters and wait days or weeks to receive them. Now, you can communicate instantly and get a reply. 

So leverage what technology has made available to talk and spend time together. You can read books, play games and watch movies together. You can even share a playlist and enjoy the same music. 

Ensure you include the other in your life as much as possible.

  1. Spice up and make the relationship interesting

You can make long distance relationships more interesting by doing things outside the box. 

Just like in a relationship where the couple live in the same place, a long distance couple can also be spontaneous, creative and fun.

You can surprise each other by sending a gift, lunch at work, a surprise visit or travel plans. This is not exhaustive, of course; think of different ways you can do beyond the usual to make your relationship exciting.

Also Read: 24 Romantic Ways to Surprise Your Partner to Wow Them

  1. Be honest

If you have committed to being in a relationship, then be honest. Tell your partner the truth. 

Remember that being honest also covers transparency. 

We all know what we need to tell our partners; please tell them.  

  1. Make plans to visit each other

Always make plans to see each other. Depending on your schedule, try to see each other at least once a year. 

It’s important to remind each other why you are enduring the months without each other.

  1. Have a plan to live in the same place

Have an end in view. You should not be in a long distance relationship where there is no plan to live together. 

Nobody should be in an everlasting long distance relationship. 

The fact that the days of the distance are numbered is enough to make your long distance relationship work because you have something to look forward to.

Your long distance relationship can work

You can make a long distance relationship work; it is not impossible. 

However, long distance relationships are for mature minds. If you cannot handle it, don’t venture into it.